After a student got an invitation to a formal school event, her friend told her that he went last year and the food was whack. I explained how it was good food, but fancy food that she might not be used to. Her response: “Fancy food? You mean I’m gonna eat white people food?”
“I’m valid and you’re salad!”
Miss, what’s a dragon queen?
Kid 1: Every time I laugh at someone something bad happens.
Me: Maybe that’s because you shouldn’t be laughing at people! Have you ever heard of karma??
Kid 1: What?! Karma’s a store!
Kid 2: No… Karma is a club on the Jersey Shore!
Screaming: My ball’s attached to my leg!! I gotta stretch them out!!
Kid: [whining]I don’t wanna write, yo!
Me: Can you please speak a little more appropriately for school?
Kid: Like what? Yo?
Kid: Miss, I live in the hood.